For two days I’ve been obsessed with the song “Good Intent” from Kimbra. She’s a 20 year old singer/song-writer from New Zealand. Sadly, her album isn’t available yet in the U.S. Thank God for the internet! This video is fun and has a hot, Don Draper look alike. Oh and the fashion! The fashion! Enjoy!

Over the I was stuck inside because of Hurricane Irene. Thankfully, nothing major happened in my area, just some tree branches on the ground and a lost internet connection at work. Since I was stuck inside all weekend, I used the opportunity to watch a movie I’ve been hearing about practically everywhere, Kings Of Pastry.

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Kings Of Pastry is from legendary documentary team, D.A. Pennebaker and Chris Hegedus (Don’t Look Back, The War Room). They follow some of the world’s greatest pastry chefs as they compete for one of the highest culinary honors, the Meilleur Ouvrier de France. I expected the movie to be like an episode of Top Chef with over the top egos and tons of shouting, but what I got instead were chefs who were more like Olympic athletes training relentlessly, straining their personal relationships and then giving everything of themselves during strenuous timed events.

Today’s Thursday and we know what that means….Three Things Thursday! If you’re new to the blog, this is a post where I list three things that are annoying me this week. Basically, I whine about my white people problems. You get your chance in the comments.

1. Unedited Bass Booming. The best thing about warm weather is being able to feel the breeze when you’re driving in your car with the windows down, but you ruin it for everybody when you drive through a parking lot or pull up to a red light blaring Lil Wayne’s finest—especially when there are senior citizens or worse, kids in the backseat of the next car exposed to his every “fuck” or “bitch”. Listen to what you want, but don’t blast it loud enough so the rest of us can hear it.

2. Being Sent A Message That Was Sent To Multiple Recipients And Getting Replies From Everybody. Someone I know sent a message to a bunch of us asking for our address for wedding invitations. Next thing you know, I’m getting messages from everybody on the list with their address. No need to hit “reply all”, everyone doesn’t need your address. This stuff happens all the time! Learn how to email people!

3. What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger. Someone said that to me yesterday and I wanted to smack them. First of all, I hate feel good quotes. People say them when they don’t have an original thought in their head to offer some actual advice or support. Second, it’s not true. Osteoporosis won’t kill me, but it certainly won’t make me stronger. If I get hit by a bus and survive, I’m not going to be any stronger. I’ve had my heart broken many times and I don’t feel any stronger afterwards. I feel more beat down and want even more to spend my life alone. Sure there are situations you learn from, but I really really hate this quote and ones similar to it.

I won’t be posting tomorrow so no It’s OK! post this week. I’m taking a blogging break for a bit. Be back sometime soon!

Happy Hump Day! First things first, I want to announce the winner of the 30 Day Shred Giveaway. The winner is #24 Jenny. Her favorite movie is Cruel Intentions. Can’t go wrong with Ryan Phillipe! I think he got a bad rep in the whole divorce from Reese. I’m not a fan of hers, something about her just screams BITCH! Team Ryan all the way. Email me your address Natalie at [email protected] and I’ll get the Shred right out to you.

I spent last night baking some treats for a blogger bake swap. I can’t tell you what I made and I don’t think I’m supposed to say who they’re going to. She knows they’re coming, but I think it’s supposed to be a surprise to the others participating in the swap. All I can say is they’re my favorite and they baked up perfectly.

And are packed and ready to go.

I’ll give you a hint and say that these are not plain old chocolate chip cookies. Anyway, you may remember in my post yesterday that I said I had decided to go on prescription drugs for my fibro pain. Well, after suffering from the side effects I decided to stop taking them cold. I’m sure this wasn’t the best way to stop, but I can’t deal with the bloating and constant bowel issues. Another one of the side effects is “sudden death”. This one scares me the most because if I were to suddenly die, no one would know for a while. No one calls anyone anymore and if I didn’t return a text, I don’t think anyone would think anything of it. They might notice if I didn’t show up for work, but they hardly notice when I’m here so who knows? Another reason I don’t want to suddenly die is because I’d like to write my own obituary and have a good head shot taken for it. I haven’t done that yet so I need to stay alive at least until that’s all sorted out. I’m going to go back to trying to manage it through diet and take it more serious this time around. People have suggested going gluten free, but I’m not interested in that. I think FINALLY giving up Diet Coke, sugar, other artificial sweeteners and eating a more plant based diet will be a good place to start. Back to basics! I’ll keep you updated on whether or not it helps. I just don’t think drugs are for me.

Do you find yourself constantly doing things you swear you’re not going to do anymore? No matter how hard you try or how many times you tell yourself you’re going to STOP IT! you don’t? I’ve been telling myself to change a few things lately, but I don’t. I hate change and I’m a creature of habit. Oh and also a glutton for punishment. I thought maybe if I put these things out there, I’ll stop doing them, but I doubt it. Worth a try thought right? Here are things I need to stop doing:

• Not going to the beach. Every weekend when we have nice weather, I wake up, pack a lunch and get my beach gear ready. I walk outside to my car and say screw it and walk up the hill to the pool instead. I hate driving to the beach, looking for parking and a spot to lay down on. Nevermind the annoying college kids who talk so loud the entire beach can hear them and the toddlers running around because their parents aren’t watching them. Oh and I have the bladder the size of a pea so walking a mile to the bathroom every half hour is a pain in the ass. The pool is quiet and I’m usually the only one there. I need to get to the beach though. I want to hear the waves and feel the sand beneath my feet.
• Not cooking. For the past month….er, longer than that. I’ve had either a salad or a hummus wrap. They take two seconds to put together and I’m the only one I’m making dinner for. If I’m honest, I stopped even trying to cook when my ex and I broke up. That was a long time ago. I like cooking for other people because I honestly don’t care what I eat. I don’t crave things and I don’t ever feel hungry. I just eat every 3-4 hours because I know I have to. I deserve better though. I’m worth it damn it!
• Reading websites that make me feel bad about myself. I’m not talking about blogs. There’s a sports website that I LOVE and think is hilarious, but it’s catered towards men, college-aged men to be specific. They have hilarious news articles mixed in with the sports and the guy who runs the website doesn’t take himself seriously and is pretty funny. The downside is that there are pics of half naked women. I appreciate a nice looking woman so it’s not the pictures that bother me, it’s the comments. They’re very demeaning and they usually call the hottest woman on the planet fat or they point out her cellulite. It makes me never want to be naked in front of a man again. I know the guys making the comments are probably fat lards on the other side of the computer, but it still bothers me. I blame myself for reading the comments so it’s my own fault. I enjoy torturing myself.
• Taking prescription medicine. I don’t talk about it a lot, but I have the chronic pain disease, fibromyalgia. I didn’t want to take perscription meds for the pain, but nothing I did helped so I started taking prescription drugs a few months ago. The drugs only helped the pain a little bit and the side effects have been unpleasant to say the least. I retain water and for the past two weeks, I’ve been crapping my brains out. I know it’s from the drugs because I haven’t changed anything in my diet. I should just stop taking them, but I’m afraid I’ll end up in terrible pain. I have an appointment with my doctor this weekend to discuss my options, but I don’t think there are any other options for me at this point.
  

I don’t want to leave you with the image of me crapping my brains out so I’ll leave you with this image of a man I lust after.

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That would be Benedict Cumberbatch. He’s the sexiest Englishman on the planet and the star of Sherlock. If you aren’t watching it, you need to start. It’s on the Netflix.

Hello there! Over the weekend, there was a discussion on tumblr about what trolling is and isn’t. In the blogging world, the word “troll” is used to describe someone someone who posts inflammatory,or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum, chat room, or blog, with the primary intent of provoking readers into an emotional response or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.

General consensus in this discussion was that a lot of people use that word without knowing the definition above. So, let’s go over it shall we?

A troll is not someone who disagrees with your point of of view. A troll is not someone who simply points out that something you wrote requires the use of spell check. A troll is not someone that points out that maybe you shouldn’t buy two iced coffees a day if in that same post you say you can’t afford health insurance. A troll is not someone who asks why you ran 5 miles tonight when you ran 5 miles this morning and aren’t currently training for anything.

A troll is someone who comments to tell you look fat in your shorts, a troll is someone who comments to tell you your boyfriend is ugly, a troll is someone who comments that your an anorexic whore. Do you see the difference? Okay good.

Now, if you’re reading a blog where you’re constantly slamming your head against the desk because you don’t understand their wacky pedicure buying, no health insurance ways, you should probably delete them from your reader. If you’re constantly telling someone to use their spell check and to proofread their posts, but they never do, you should probably stop reading them as well. Afraid you’ll miss out on a good shit show if you do? Don’t worry, you’ll have friends that will email you their ridiculous posts. That’s what friends are for! So now that we’re all clear on this, let’s stop calling each other trolls or haters, respect other people’s opinions and maybe have a little self-awareness now and then.

Hello! When I got home last night, you know what I did. Oh yeah….

Look at how clean it is! I got right in there and rubbed it down. That bathroom is so happy he’s sparkling. He’s happy, I’m happy. So fresh and so clean!

It’s Friday and we know what that means….It’s time for It’s OK! I don’t read Glamour because I’m too busy living it, but I do like their “It’s OK…”feature where they assure us that our weird little habits are completely normal. I’m dedicating this post to assuring you it’s okay to do the following this weekend:

• To think that people who think the glass is either half full or half empty are either a cliche or an alcoholic.
• To just not “get” mayonnaise. Sandwich artists need to stop putting it on everything.
  
• To make your own popsicles. Hurry! Summer’s almost over!
• To wonder if egg rolls are just Chinese Hot Pockets.
• To be excited that Halloween candy is already in the grocery store. You like to stock up early on all that candy you’re going to pretend you gave away.
• To wonder if napping on the toilet means you’re a multitasker. Of course it does!
  
• To find out what fashionista’s are really talking about by following the CondeElevator on Twitter. Rich people are funny.
• To wonder why people brag about how early they wake up, but never about how late they sleep in. I’m usually more impressed with the latter.
• To smile when you see a young man race along the side of a moving subway car just to give his friend the finger. True love never dies.
• To finally understand what marathoners feel like after you flew through your dvr’d shows. What a rush!
• To be uncomfortable when people try to make nicknames for themselves happen. Really? You can’t just make up a nickname after the age of 25. If it didn’t happen in high school or college, it’s never going to happen for you.
  
• To roll your eyes at your friend when she suggests watching Cocktail. Why watch Cocktail when you can live it?!
  
• To be embarrassed when you drop a bottle of vodka trying to show off your Cocktail moves. Probably should’ve warmed up.
• To not be sure if the relationship is going to work out when your gentleman caller doesn’t get any of the rap lyrics you like to shout out during awkward silences. Come on dude, who doesn’t know, “I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one!” Get with it.
• To have the only exercise you do today be three sets of ten of kegel exercises. Keepin’ it tight ladies, keepin’ it tight.
• To jam out to one of my favorite songs of all time:

Any fun plans this weekend?

Hello, how are you this fine day? I’m bored. I’m in a training class and it sucks. I don’t understand why people who don’t know how to use computers work with computers. Who doesn’t know Excel? Come on! Anyway, I can’t wait to get home because my bathroom is a mess and I’m going to clean the balls of it.

Look at it! GROSS! Oh and yes I bring my laptop in there. I listen to sports radio when I’m getting ready. All I’m going to think about all day is going home, getting in there with my hands, working up a sweat and showing it who it’s momma is. Remember when I used to hate to clean? Oh those days are over my friends! Cleaning is like an aphrodisiac for me now. Crazy right?!

Today’s Thursday and we know what that means….Three Things Thursday! If you’re new to the blog, this is a post where I list three things that are annoying me this week. Basically, I whine about my white people problems. You get your chance in the comments.

1. Foot/Belly Photos. When you’re at the beach,please refrain from taking pictures of your super-hot flat stomach and your feet to post on the internet. First of all, you’re laying down so of course your stomach is flat. Second, I don’t need that view of your crotch, and third, I can’t think of any situation where your foot needs to ruin an otherwise fine piece of photography. Oh and why is your foot enjoying an ice cold beer? You realize your supposed to put the beer up to your lips, not your toes right?

2. The Help. I read the book and feel that it’s well-intentioned, but very flawed. To me, it’s a a story written where black people are just objects of play for white people to feel good about themselves. Books and movies like The Help allow white people to sympathize and feel apart of the black struggle without the burden of knowing that some of their ancestors more than likely harassed, beat and possibly murdered blacks in the 50s and 60s (before then even). By green lighting films like “The Help,” mainstream America can show it’s not racist because the film focuses on the civil rights. At the same time, the film is rose colored enough that the foul, vile images of racism are filtered. They are touched upon, but not in any way that would actually show what was real at the time. We see this in our own American history textbooks where racism is reduced to a portion of a chapter about the 1960′s. I will give credit to The Help for getting people talking about racism because it’s still very much a part of our culture. If you want to see a movie that will show you the reality of the time I suggest Stanley Nelson’s Freedom Riders.

3. Clapping At The End Of The Movie. It’s probably a good time to tell you that those giant people on the enormous screen in front of you — um, yeah, they’re not real.

What’s bugging you this week?